Chronic Lying

The seeds of chronic lying may be sewn in childhood. A young person who gets in the habit of being less than truthful may carry that habit through to adulthood. Early intervention by parents and other important adults in the child's life may help to break the pattern before it turns into a life-long habit.

Children Lie

Most children will lie about something on occasion. This behavior begins somewhere between five and six years of age. Reasons they may lie include:

• Attempting to avoid consequences for their actions
• Trying to make up for feeling they are not liked
• To get another child into trouble
• To get attention from adults

By the time children are between seven and eight years old, they may lie to avoid something they don't want to do. Another reason a child of this age may lie is to avoid punishment.

While adults may tell children that it's important to be truthful, they tend to be more accepting of "little white lies" than more serious infractions.

Here are some examples of minor lies that aren't considered chronic lying, even though they are quite common in conversation:

• Lying to avoid hurting someone's feelings
• Lying to someone so that they won't worry
• Lying to avoid feeling embarrassed
• Lying to withdraw from an awkward situation

While most people do lie occasionally about something relatively minor, using this strategy as a first resort is a sign that the person has a chronic lying problem. The person who lies without getting any real benefit as a result has a definite issue.

Other signs that you are dealing with a chronic liar include when the person lies to avoid getting into trouble but needs to keep adding to the original lie to keep it plausible. If a chronic liar is caught in a lie, his or her strategy to deal with the situation is to make up another lie to cover up the first one.

Here are some suggestions to help you deal with a child who is having lying issues:

• Begin by setting a good example. If you show your children that you are a truthful person, they are less likely to lie themselves.
• When you catch your child in a lie, listen to his reasons for doing so, and then explain that no matter what he was trying to achieve (avoid punishment, get attention, etc.), that his behavior was unacceptable.
• Keep the focus on the child's behavior without putting him down. Children who lie as a coping mechanism likely have low self-esteem. Your goal should be to help them learn more positive behavior patterns, as opposed to making them feel worse about themselves.
• Make sure that there are logical consequences for a child who lies. You may want to ask the child what he or she is prepared to give up because of the lie.
• When you "catch" the child telling the truth in a situation where he may have been considering lying, praise him for doing the right thing. The positive reinforcement will do more good than spending time on lectures.

While chronic lying is not a psychological disorder recognized by the DSM-IV (the Diagnostic Manual used by health care professionals to diagnose mental disorders), it has been associated with other issues. A child who lies regularly may be doing so in an attempt to deal with ADHD. He may be doing so to hide a problem in school or a learning disability.

A child who is displaying the following behaviors in conjunction with lying may have a psychological disorder, such as conduct disorder, and needs to be evaluated by a professional:

• Cheating
• Fighting
• Lying
• Skipping school
• Stealing

• Smoking Withdrawal Symptoms
• Caffeine Withdrawal
• Anti Depression Foods
• Depression Quiz
• Am I an Alcoholic

• Causes of Drug Addiction
• Drug Addiction Poems
• Compulsive Lying
• Treatment for Compulsive Lying
• Short Term Effects of Smoking Crystal Meth